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Dedd is a place for people to discover and bury dead content from anywhere on the web. From the biggest online destinations to the most obscure blog, Dedd buries the oldest, least relevant and least popular stuff as voted on by our users.Think of it as the Google of…well, just think of it as Google.

“I was doing research for a paper I was writing,” says student Arla Krapsmackle, “What I didn’t realize was that the 1st article returned was written in 1992, totally irrelevant.”

The vast majority of stuff on the web is irrelevant, outdated, or just plain stupid. Search Engine Optimization (SEO) experts have taken over the web, ranking websites higher than some well-respected government and educational websites where very relevant information can be had.

Well, now there is a place to stuff all those pages: Dedd. When you come across a page that is not relevant to your search, or is stupid, or you disagree with, or is just plain dumb – you have the option to Deddit. Click that Dedd icon and bury that mother in the Dedd archives. With enough votes you will never have to see that site come up in Google, Yahoo or Live.com ever again!

In a surprise announcement at the World Wide Clock Manufacturing (WWCM) conference, Steve Jobs’s keynote revealed Apple’s plan to enter into the time-providing industry with the upcoming release of iclock. Built on the ever-popular Shuffle form factor, iclock is designed to provide exclusive updates to the time (as well as hold up to 1 hour of music). To receive updates to time, users will have to subscribe through iTunes to receive AAIC content time content. These unique feeds allows users to fast-forward through unpopular hours (8:00am on Monday mornings) to the time they desire (5:00pm on Friday).

“Apple is delivering reality to the old adage ‘It’s 5′clock somewhere’…with the iclock, it really can be 5 o’clock ANYWHERE.” said Jobs, “The days of boring meetings are over – iclock can take you right to the time you want, whenever you want it.”

In addition to delivering standard hour/min/sec updates, the iclock can be configured to deliver audible voice-overs from well-known celebrities. With the initial release, artists such as Metallica, REM and Madonna have already agreed to lend their voices to the iclock.

In a quick response to this announcement, Coldplay has already announced plans to release DRM-free time updates via their website, available for download – at whatever the price users think fair.

Web 2.0 technology has created a new and improved presidential candidate, dubbed Obama2.0. The hierarchical, top down administration has been combined with the advantages of social networking and grass roots support and fundraising.

It was determined (through a series of exhaustive online surveys) that the candidate be multi-racial, liberal, very well-spoken, highly educated, with just a smattering of negatives to make him feel more real and less plastic than John Edwards. From YouTube endorsements (I’ve got a crush on Obama) to celebrity endorsements ( Scarlett Johansen) the story of Web 2.0 technology Obama2.0 is like something out of a Silicon Valley think tank. Which he is.

Expected to poll well in a variety of communities – both online and in real-life, Obama2.0 is a “mash-up” of previous presidential candidates, including John F. Kennedy, Robert Kennedy, and Jimmy Carter. This real-life avatar expects to be downloaded heavily in November, in full expectation of it’s initial release.

iTele-phoni makes network cabling cool again!

Remember when Networking was cool? Okay, maybe you are too young, but back in the day anything to do with computer networking was cool with a capital “K”. It was sooo cool to be able to spout jargon like LAN/WAN or even PAN, are you withit MAN? With computer networks, you could even do the CAN/CAN!

iTele-phoni puts a cool sheen over network cabling: the cables are sheathed in a flexible plitanium coated surface which reflects the light in a prismatic effect. Aesthetics do matter, even if it’s the same old cabling being buried under 5 feet of dirt.

Critics, unfazed by the financial success of iTele-phoni, are unmoved:

“They are just encasing the same old network cable in a shiny sheath – nothing revolutionary about that,” responds John J. Jingleheimerschmidt, a networking exec at the Cable Stable. “It’s not even using new technology. Comcast came out with that sheath back in the 90′s. All they are doing is playing catch up.”

Mr. Jingleheimerschmidt did have to admit that iTele-Phoni’s marketing machine is second to none.

“Hey, they can put lipstick on a dog and make it sexy, I’ll give them that, but revolutionary it is not.”

iTele-Phoni was announced at the CableWorld Conference in San Francisco on June 8th. The iTele-Phoni’s network cable will transform IP packets into it’s own proprietary IP packet, which will only be able to be deciphered by users using Motorola modems. Software to jail break the proprietary IP packet is being released by independent software developers and is reportedly available on Craigslist and Ebay.

iTele-Phoni – bringing sexyback into the plumbing!

Let’s face it – we’re all sick of online predators creating false profiles and making social networks unsafe. It seems the only justice we could level is publicly humiliating them on national TV. But who has time to lurk online, entrapping these felons while capturing the whole incident on high-definition tape for your local television broadcast?

JailByte does – our company is comprised of social community “specialists” adept at creating fake profiles of teenage girls and boys. These specialists are trained in all aspects of teen culture – music, clothes, likes/dislikes and the newest teen texting trends. Then they lurk online, hoping to draw predators to their profiles, and set up a rendezvous at some undisclosed location (i.e. “a home where the parents are gone for a long weekend”) – little do they know, we are leading them into our state-of-the-art studio.

At our studio/house, JailByte employs the smarmiest interviewers that greet these unsuspecting felons at the front door, and inquire about their intentions, shove copies of licentious email transcripts in their face and ask why they brought beer to this meeting – and we capture it all on four cameras! Once the confrontation ends, our team quickly edits the tape into a six minute clip, properly packaged for your local media outlets! Shame and frustration awaits these predators – and your ratings will rise!

Note: due to legal complications, JailByte is unable to provide our services to aid and assist in any legal enforcement effort.

Sick of how the internet has become a cesspool of cheesy scraped content, thin affiliate marketing pages, porn and gambling websites? Well, step aside, for a new technology has been born: the iInternet, the internet for the internet!

Going back to the origins of the Internet as a place of learning with the free exchange of ideas among enlightened academics, hi-octane scientists and engineers have created a sort of internet for the Internet.

The Internet was very pleased: “FInally, a place to call our own! Now every site I see doesn’t have to be about porn or gambling, or the egocentric solipsistic whinings of privileged technocrats complaining about how awful their life is – how ’bout me! I’m the one that has to listen to all this crap!”

The iInternet was built as a joint project between IBM, Microsoft, Oracle, Sun Microsystems Google and Al Gore. Apple was notably excluded from discussions. The iInternet has been housed within the tesseract of a wormhole and for now is pristine, truly knowledge driven and uncommercial.

But that may change. The Internet was heard mumbling, ‘Great, now how are we going to make money off this?’

We take the “social” out of social networking.

Why go through the trouble of creating a secret identity (so your boss won’t know), and then having to port it over from Friendster to Myspace and then to Facebook or whatever flavor of the month social media?

And what about the pain of informing your real friends of your new secret identity, and then the pain of getting your friends to port over as well?

Well, now your worries are over!

After filling out a short form we will create a new secret identity for you, complete with friends, friend comments, interests and more. We will even blog, comment and send out fake party and event notices to all your fake friends.

Be the life of the (virtual) party!