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New Chuck Norris Unsocial Network: MyFistInYourFacebook.com

October 27, 2008 By: zenboy Category: Celebritech No Comments →

Following on the heels of Hoffspace, the David Hasselhoff Social Network, Chuck Norris has released his own version of an online community called MyFistInYourFacebook.com, an Unsocial Network. Much like lolcats, lolroadkill and lolfurniture, this site is mostly about posting photos with Chuck Norris one-liners:

Chuck Norris does NOT need a social network, the social network needs HIM

Chuck Norris will kick Sh*tkickr.com ASS!

Chuck Norris kicks Fight Club ASS!

MyFistInYourFacebook.com also has the ability for members to create groups, much like Myspace and Facebook have now. Except on Chuck Norris’ site, these groups are geared less around building a community and more towards fighting one-upmanship, such as the “I could take you” group, or the related “I could take you, and yer mom too” group. Discussions range from schoolyard fight videos to discussions with lines like “This fight would take two hits: I hit you, and you hit the ground!”

MyFistInYourFacebook.com has also integrated the “Tap-o-wicki” social network for young men who post about their latest (imaginary) conquests, with users in the discussion areas posting about, “Yeah, Marissa Miller and me, yeah, I tapped that,” and “I roundhouse kicked Brad Pitt, and Angelina Jolie left him for me. Yeah, I tapped that twice.”

Marissa Miller and a Photoshopped guys head

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Snatch! - LinkedIn for office dating and romance

September 22, 2008 By: zenboy Category: Social Media No Comments →

snatch - a new type of office romance

Just banged the office admin, and now the tales of your lack of “sexpertise” are making the rounds at work? Do you look away as you pass your ex in the long hallway on your way to the water cooler? Groups of your ex’s cadre sistahs dissing you behind double-takes and half-covered faces, with sounds of derisive laughter ringing over the cubicle walls?

THE OFFICE -- NBC Series -- Pam and Jim Share a Valentine\'s moment -- NC Entertainment Photo: Paul Drinkwater

Despite the maxim: “never date a co-worker” (otherwise known as “don’t shit where you eat”), office romances still happen. One study showed that the place where we meet over 90% of friends and acquaintances is - you guessed it - at our places of employment.The odds are we’re going to hook up.

Since they can’t change the statistic, the makers of Snatch! decided to “tap into” this corporate zeitgeist by creating a new mashup, combining aspects the social networking site LinkedIn with the dating aspects of Match.com.

Now, instead of dating coworkers, you can leverage your LinkedIn connections for more than just employment contacts, but for dating and casual one-night sex connections as well. Hurting for a raise as well as needing a booty call? Why not combine both? Now with Snatch! you can!

With Snatch! you can virtually “wink” at a person at a different company that you may have met at a conference without running into interference from your HR department. Chatting on Snatch! about wanting to “hit that” is free of the risk of IT forwarding your risque emails to your meddlesome HR rep (to add to your already overflowing personnel folder). Now you can tap work-booty with impunity, and the next morning still go to the office with you head held high, (not avoiding eye contact as you typically do).

There has been talk of abuse on the network, such as users trying to “sleep their way to 500+ connections,” if you will, and CEOs using Snatch! as a sort of new feudalism - offering employees to other employers as a way to tie companies closer together (or to steal corporate secrets). The makers of Snatch! respond that while statistics show there is abuse on any social networking site, they try to discourage it by installing levels of security, such as permission-based connection building (otherwise known as “Snatch!” approval).

A contingent from those ever-invading Fuckus Focus on your own damn the Family are offended by the language used on the controls of Snatch! - such as the “Tap That!” button designed to initiate chat sessions, or the “Suckit!” button label which asks for a recommendation. They position that these languages encourage unsavory activities.

The makers of Snatch! are nonplussed: “We’re just having fun helping people to have some fun. By developing this platform, we are just making official the kind of relationships that happen anyway, in happy-hour and FAC functions. All without the ‘career-limiting’ aspects of dating and work.”

(Editors note: Snatch! is not related, except in a very parallel-ironic-universe kind of way, with the pron site snatch.com…not like we would know about those kind of websites anyway…).

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Lolfurniture: a world in which furniture doesn’t speak correct English

September 15, 2008 By: zenboy Category: Social Media 1 Comment →

With the success of annoying user-generated sites such as www.ICanHasCheezburger.com and the Lolcats franchise, web 2.0 users now have an outlet to:

  • Upload cutesy pics of animals
  • Create silly (some would say stupid) alternate spellings of words in some ersatz and imagined view of what the cat in the photo would sound like if it could speak English (in this case, they call it LOLspeak)

This ever-popular (annoying) franchise has created similar-themed UGC sites such as LOLdogs, LOLrus (walrus), and the ever-popular LOLroadkill.

It was only a matter of time before inanimate objects would get the “LOL” treatment. In an effort to sate the insatiable appetite of online users wanting to present themselves as cute and smarmy, the makers of LOLroadkill have creates an entirely new user-generated social community entitled: Lolfurniture:

lolfurniture: I can haz fat asses?

lolfurniture: I iz two hawt. Geyoff me!

lolfurniture: Tastz good! I eats it!

Immediately, online retail giants, such as Amazon, Walmart, and Target have modified their web-catalogues with the ability for users to “LOLspeak” their furniture wares. Now, not only can you find a great baby cradle online at a reasonable price, you can “LOL” yourself to sleep on it!

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Is It Real #6: Hoffspace - social networking around David Hasselhoff

August 17, 2008 By: cboyer Category: Is It Real 5 Comments →

Is It Real? - a test of your Web 2.0 savvy

In today’s Is It Real?, we present another Web 2.0 technology/service, give a brief description of what it’s about, and then challenge you to decide (without the help of the web at all) if it is real. We reveal the real answer the following Friday (as part of our Friday Fishwrap feature). Now that we understand the rules, let’s get started:

————————>

Today, we feature one of the most advanced, unique concepts I have seen in the last few months: a social networking application called “HoffSpace” - centered around David Hasselhoff. Here is an excerpt from David’s very own introduction:

“In my travels round the world I have always been surprised that no matter where I go people recognize and know me, from Europe, Australia and India to the Philippines and the Zulu Nation in South Africa…while two people from two entirely different countries and backgrounds may seem to have nothing in common, the only thing they might have in common is me… So I decided to start a network where people from across the world might come together and get a conversation started over me.”

Hence, he has launched HoffSpace - videos and photos of the adventures of his very own life (THAT NO ONE ELSE GETS TO SEE) and also from the lives of other members. He’ll also feature “Hoff TV” where (as he describes it): “I go live often.” There are chat features, the ability to create home pages with personal interests, music features, video and photo uploads…virtually everything one needs to create an online social community…all based around David Hasselhoff.

The byline of Hoffspace: “One man or woman CAN make a difference...”

So, readers of yooRyoo, I challenge you to vote below: is Hoffspace real? We’ll tally your votes all week long, and let you know the real answer on Friday.

Is "Hoffspace" really a social networking site, centered on David Hasselhoff?

  • Yes, Hoffspace must be real - I love David Hasselhoff (and I am not even German) - Hoffspace is not only real, but it's much needed (46%, 17 Votes)
  • No way can Hoffspace be real - and if it is, I'll gouge my eyes out and never look at the internet again! (38%, 14 Votes)
  • Maybe Hoffspace is real - I mean, I liked David Hasselhoff in Knight Rider and Baywatch, but is he still on TV? (16%, 6 Votes)

Total Voters: 37

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Wikipoetri 2.0

August 12, 2008 By: zenboy Category: Literature 1 Comment →

Wikipoetri 2.0

Wikipoetri 2.0 is a web-based interface utilizing wiki technology to allow users to contribute or modify poetry content. Wiki’s are often used to create collaborative and community websites. In fact, Wikipedia is one of the best know wikis in the world. Although Wikipedia is often ridiculed for its inaccuracies and contributor’s bias, the founders of Wikipoetry 2.0 say that the reason is that Wiki’s have not found their correct media for wikis to be applied.

Now they’ve found it: Poetry.

From Wikipedia:

Poetry (from the Greek poiesis, a “making” or “creating”) is a form of literary art in which language is used for its aesthetic and evocative qualities in addition to, or in lieu of, its ostensible meaning.

What this means is that you can write poetry about anything and it doesn’t really have to mean anything. Shoot, it’s perfect for wiki’s!

Having a site like Wikipoetri 2.0 is like a freshmen creative writing class back in my undergrad, “ gushes fan Fran Lieptowicz, a fan of Wikipoetri 2.0. “I mean, you add a line onto a previous line, or even edit and delete lines of poetry written before. It’s constantly evolving.”

Other writers disagree:

It’s constantly revolting,” says Rachel Summer, PhD in Poetics from the Naropa Institute of Disembodied Poetics, Boulder, Colorado: “Imagine a morass of constantly changing lines, no coherent assonance, alliteration or rhythm, and symbolism that starts and then goes nowhere. It’s ridiculous. More so, it is shameful.”

A snippet of one of the Wikipoems (version 07/08/2008 07:53pm) is called “Nostalgia”:

The lucid dreaming of driving
the headlights burn tunnels, stare hole like Superman into the night
the Venturi effect inhales the car
the night closes behind like a tight sphincter
Eat My Exhaustion

Ms. Sumner responds, “I mean, come ON, ‘stare hole like Superman into the night’? ‘the night closes behind like a tight sphincter?’ I mean, what the fuck is that?”

The anonymous founders of Wikipoetri, going by the literary poet names of Arthur Rimbaud and Charles Olsen say that Ms. Sumner is missing the point.

Wikipoetri 2.0 breaks the boundaries of traditional poetry, much in the same way that spoken word poetry broke the bounds of what was traditionally known as poetry. Like Spokenword poetry, where anyone could get up on stage and read their writings, Wikipoetri 2.0 enables poetry writers to collaborate and attempt to write a great community written poem”

Professor Sumner shudders, “It’s spray paint over the Louvre, the great tradition of Poetry. If shit can be poetry, then poetry is shit. I simply can’t abide it,” at this point Ms. Summer stuck her head in an oven and turned the gas up.

Poet Wang Zen performing the wikipoem Nostalgia
Video of the poet Wang Zen performing the
wikipoem Nostalgia, version 07/08/2008 07:53pm

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Crapulous - the newest Facebook game application from Hasbro

August 05, 2008 By: cboyer Category: Computer Gaming No Comments →

crapulous - it\'s better than Scrabulous

In a crazy move (on a triple-word play, no less), Hasbro games announced today the release of one of their newest online, Facebook game application - Crapulous!

Crapulous is an ASCII-based application available through the Facebook application interface, allowing users to clumsily play against a “computer-generated AI” player through command-line scripts.

“Loosely fashioned after such engaging games as Zork and that one the Matthew Broderick kid played in ‘Wargames,’ we’re convinced Crapulous will be as popular as ICQ,” commented Hasbro spokesperson, Crash Bandicoot.

wargames - take that WOPR

Although early beta-tests revealed difficulty installing the command-line window interface on most computers, Crapulous has already gained a significant early install base, revealed Mr. Bandicoot. “We’re definitely excited by the usability testing on Windows NT machines, but only those with more than 256kb of RAM,” he added.

Nonplussed, the creators of Scrabulous have already released their replacement game, WordScraper, and have already tracked more than 8 billion installs.

Hasbro has already tentatively announced a complete roadmap of ASCII-based games for Facebook, through the remainder of 2008, including:

  • BattleCrap - face off against another player, in this exciting, turn-by-turn script-based battle game
  • CrappyLand - where kids and adults move simple emoticons through a flat, 2-dimensional land of fun
  • Hungry Hungry Crappos - exciting turn-based action, where you compete to “eat” more “&” symbols than your computer based foes
  • Oper-crap-tion - your skill at kernel commands is put to the test…fail, and you might hear the dulcit sound of an 8-bit alarm tone from your speakers

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FauxFace - the newest in social updating!

June 12, 2008 By: cboyer Category: Social Media 1 Comment →

fauxface - the newest in social networkingTired of having to update your social networking sites? Allow Fauxface to take on the stress of daily updates. Utilizing a team of skilled updaters (completely fluent in English) and open access to online photo sites (such as Flickr and iStockPhoto), our company will assume the burden of social updates, including statuses, uploading new photo albums, interacting with your friends, texting, Pandora updates and a variety of other day-to-day activities that you want to convey to your friends. New – our specialized Scrabulous team will guarantee an online edge to any social game. Our hourly rates are affordable – to learn more, check out MySpace page: www.MySpace.com/MyNameisBoub

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